Healing My Nose: A Basal Cell Skin Cancer Journey

A journey of facial basal cell carcinoma, from exploring the stages and the diagnosis to the treatment and process of healing both physically and emotionally.

Written by Kelli Ellis

Cancer is a word that strikes fear into the hearts of many, and when I heard it in relation to my own health, I was no exception. This is the story of my battle with basal cell carcinoma on the bridge of my nose—a journey that tested my vanity, patience, and ultimately, my gratitude for health and healing.

The Diagnosis: A Moment of Fear

It all started with a small, flat, growing spot on my nose that just wouldn't go away. After some time and a nagging sense that something wasn't right, I finally went to see my dermatologist. A biopsy confirmed my worst fears: basal cell carcinoma, a type of skin cancer. While it's one of the most common and least aggressive forms of skin cancer, the word "cancer" is never easy to hear. I am no stranger to basal cell, as I’ve had plenty removed, but not in the middle of my face! As the doctor explained the possible outcomes and treatments - I just kept thinking, how can you remove that much skin and not change my entire appearance?

The Surgery: A Test of Courage

The surgery to remove the cancer involved an incision that stretched across the top of my nose from one side to the other removing a dime sized circle of skin via the Mohs method.

Mohs surgery is a precise surgical technique used to treat skin cancer, particularly basal cell carcinoma. The procedure involves removing the visible tumor and a thin layer of surrounding skin. Each layer is examined under a microscope for cancer cells. If cancer is detected, another layer is removed and examined. This process repeats until no cancer cells are found. The procedure was explained to me in detail while it was happening, and while the doctor was optimistic he could close my wound with a simple line stitch, I couldn't help but feel terrified. The thought of having skin removed from my nose, coupled with a tip lift to ensure everything healed correctly, was overwhelming.

The Immediate Aftermath: Facing My Vanity

When I removed the bandages I was shocked by what I saw. My nose, my defining feature, was not only swollen and bruised. The tip of my nose was lifted in a way that gave me a "piggy nose" appearance. I was devastated. The first thing thought of was an old Twilight Zone episode (yes, I am 54 so I remember those!) When a man woke up after surgery, with what we calla perfect nose, but the nurses and doctor were horrified cause they all had piggy noses and thought he looked freakish!  I panicked —would my nose ever look the same again? I felt a pang of guilt for being so concerned about my appearance when I should have been celebrating the fact that the cancer was gone.

The Healing Process: Patience and Persistence

The weeks following the surgery were some of the most challenging. The swelling was persistent, and I avoided social events, not wanting to explain my new look to curious eyes. During work Zoom meetings, I wore a bandage to cover my flared nostrils, feeling self-conscious about my appearance. It was during this time that I had to confront my vanity head-on. I realized that while it's natural to care about our appearance, I had to shift my focus to gratitude. Gratitude for the skilled hands of my surgeons, for the early detection of the cancer, and for the support of my loved ones.

Within four weeks, the swelling began to subside, and my nose slowly started to look more like itself again. Each small change brought a wave of relief and hope. I learned the importance of patience and trusting the healing process, even when it seemed unbearably slow.

The Reflection: Gratitude Over Vanity

Looking back now, I'm incredibly grateful for my health and the lessons learned through this experience. My nose might not be exactly the same as it was before, but it serves as a reminder of my resilience and the importance of prioritizing health over vanity.

To anyone facing a similar journey, know that it's okay to feel scared and even vain at times. Your feelings are valid. But also remember to give yourself grace and focus on the bigger picture. Healing takes time, and with patience and support, you will come through it stronger than before.

Embracing the New Me

Today, I wear my very slight scar with pride. It's a symbol of what I've overcome and a reminder to take care of my skin and health. Basal cell carcinoma may have left its mark on me, but it also taught me invaluable lessons about resilience, patience, and gratitude.

I really want to reiterate that it's okay to be afraid, it's okay to care about your appearance, but most importantly, it's okay to take your time to heal and embrace your journey, scars and all.

Xo,

Kelli

We thank Kelli for her bravery in sharing her story on our blog and thank you for being here!

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Take care & continue creating,